For I know…

“‘For I know the plans I have you,’ declares…..”. Funny how when I took this to be my life verse some time in high school; I never knew how often I would try to rewrite it to say  “declares me”.  I had my life mapped out from the time I was old enough to figure out what life was supposed to be.
I’d make best friends in elementary school that I would have in my wedding. High school (social and academic) would be a breeze; driving at 16, graduating by 18 , and going away to college.  I’d major in elementary ed, but I’d be heavily involved in anying singing/ acting related.

I'm Harmony (the green one)

At college I’d meet the man of my dreams; it would be love at first sight.  We would marry right after college and have our first child by our second year of marriage. By 30, I would have 3.5 perfect chldren, an ideal marriage, family all around us, the PERFECT life.  Well if you have read this far I know you are laughing at my naivety to it all, but I’d planned it all out, prayed about it, and God said he would give me the desires of my heart, SO….
SO nothing!  God says “For I know!“. In other words, “Sarah, you know nothing just follow me I’ll get you there.”  In between my third and fourth grade years, we moved from Florida to Missouri; there went the best friends I’d be with forever.

Florida to Missouri

High school social life was….well, not a breeze, didn’t drive til 18.  I did graduate, but college was a 15 minute drive from home.

13 in my class

Elementary Ed was my major, but other then a year in choir my acting and singing fell by the wayside.  Turns out the man of my dreams was not love at first sight (it’s okay he knows it, and the feeling was mutual).  By college graduation, our relationship had grown to a “tolerated acquaintance” so no wedding bells.

A growing relationship

I wasn’t married til 25, and our first child did not arrive until our third year of marriage.  I turned 30 with only one child and prayers for another; my children are not perfect, neither are I or my spouse (I can hear the gasps of shock).
Mostly our family is around us, but we have had to mourn the loss of one parent.  MY perfect life….yeah, that didn’t happen.

Lance and his Dad

SO what have I learned….that the Author of my life is not be limited by my own drawn up blueprints.  His ways are not my own, and what my vision of perfect was…..was way off base!  Life is not perfect, but I am not perfect.  However, my life has been perfectly planned out by hands more skilled than mine.

Speaks for itself

In His omniscience, He has given me the perfect life, and I would not trade a moment of it.  Each trial and triumph has shaped me and will continue to do so if I stop trying to “declare” my own plans.

Finding my inner “girliness”

I am not a clothes shopper.  I wouldn’t know how to properly apply make-up even with a how-to manual.  And my hair and I have never seen eye to eye!!  BUT that is why God gives us good girlfriends.  Ones who patiently work you through the comfort zones where you have chosen to barricade yourself.   They let you be honest.  Not once do they judge.   Suddenly all those visual inadequacies that cause you GREAT self consciousness fade away.  I love the women God has placed in my life.  That group of comrades with whom you can  laugh til you snort, be truthful when they ask, “How are you?”, and ugly cry ( women you understand the red blotchy face and the nose that runneth over.)  I am finding more and more that once I embrace just being REAL; no longer hiding under that “all things are perfect” facade, I become more confident and more real to myself.  It is always bad when you find you lie to yourself as much as others.  AND even more preposterous is lying to God, as though He isn’t, well, God, omniscient, omnipresent.  Come on, who am I fooling.

So in being real, I found I wanted to find a little of the “girly” in me.   That and the perk to surprise my husband!  Wanting to change up my hair mostly, I put myself in the competent hands of my girlfriend at church.  DAWN, you know how I love ya!!  She was on board 110% and took things a step further to suggest we do it without Lance’s knowledge.  She offered to do my make-up, and then she grabbed an outfit from her closet for me to wear.  I mean seriously beyond the call of duty.  So the plan was in the works and last night I shocked the pants off my husband when I showed up for our early Valentine’s dinner……well, he admitted to having to take a second look because he did not recognize me.  🙂before_after

A few before and afters


And just a few from our nightIMG_2813IMG_2812

The Puzzle Gene

I am so happy that my son has inherited my love for jigsaw puzzles.  No matter the difficulty he always wants to try.  I used to do puzzles all the time.  As a teacher I found it to be a HUGE relaxation technique for my Christmas Breaks.  My parents bought me puzzles to do over school breaks; they were great date night activities with Lance.  After we were married, they made great Christmas presents.

I have worked up to 5,000 piece puzzles.  I have worked extremely difficult ones, ones that were more for fun, ones that presented an exciting challenge.  I worked FOREVER on one that was the same picture front and back just turned 90 degrees.  My favorite of all I have ever done was a Winnie the Pooh profile shot that was made up of teeny tiny scenes from all the classic Winnie the Pooh stories.

My love for puzzle making started at 2 years old (according my mother).  My great grandfather was an amazing woodworker, and to add to that he loved to do puzzles and then build frames for them.  He instilled in me the love for them in the hours he would spend teaching me how to create the outer edge and work methodically from one piece of the scene to another.  I don’t remember all the way back to two years old, but I do remember his visits to Florida.  He would stay with my Grandma, and mom would drop me off for time with him while my sisters were in school.  Grandma would make me waffles in the toaster and Great Grandpa would have the card table all set up with his newest puzzle.  He loved scenery.  One of the more difficult I remember working with him was  a picture of an autumn landscape…trees, leaves, a blend of oranges, red, yellows, and browns.  He never got frustrated with me.  Always took my hand and guided me to gently lay the pieces together.  “Never force them, ”  he’d tell me.  He taught me how to flip them over if I wasn’t sure to truly be able to tell if they interlocked correctly.

So glad for the love he gave me of a good puzzle, and I am soo happy to be enjoying them with Asher.  To hear his excitement as he gets two pieces together, reminds me of the days when I was that excited.  Great Grandpa always took a moment to stop his own to work to get excited with me.  I pray one day Asher will also look back at the quiet puzzle moments and love the time we had.  I am sure that there will be puzzles in heaven, and I can’t wait to sit down with my Great Grandpa and work on one together again.

Turning Two

Faith 112Happy birthday, my sweet little Faith.! You definitely keep me on my toes.  I can not get over how quickly you have grown up.  You amaze me with all your little discoveries, and the things you figure out all on your own.  Faith, I didn’t think I could get into all the pink and girlie little things.  Your momma is not a “frills” kind of girl.  Faith 276But OH how I have loved dressing you and shopping for all the cutest outfits and shoes.  Shoes is the most shocking, really when your Daddy and I got married he had more shoes then me.  I love buying shoes for you; mostly because how your eyes light up.  You love shoes; which scares me a little for future budget issues, but for now as you toddle around in your dress-up heels or clomp around in mine, I can’t get enough of it.  Copy of IMG_4427You love to dance too. No matter the song or the place, you are always moving to the music.  Just the other night you found great joy standing on your Daddy’s feet while he danced you around.


You run to him now and climb on top of his toes.  You look up at him with this little sparkle in your eye, and he can’t resist. Somehow you knew the moment I put your new tutu on for your birthday that you must spin, and spin, and spin.

Oh, but you are also so full of mischief.

You wedge yourself into the smallest spaces.  You climb to high places where you do not belong.  Faith, what you manage to get into makes me wonder if you have a little Houdini in you.  “Seriously?!  Oh Faith!” comes out of my mouth a lot,


that and the use of your middle name.  I can not get over how very little you speak words but the volumes you speak with the looks you can give.

I’m not sure where you learned to roll your eyes, or how you know we will melt when you wrinkle your noses and shoot off the perfect little smile.


You touch a place in my heart that makes me want to snuggle you and not let go.

My dearest baby girl, I do not want you to grow.  I do not want you to change.  BUT yet grow you do and changing you are.  You decided to potty train yourself by telling me when you needed to go.  You want to dress yourself as you slide two legs into one leg hole and pull up with all your might.  You independent streak is obvious as you holler “Do it” meaning I want to do it myself.


Oh and that brings up the stubborn little temper you have which gets you into the most trouble.  Your Daddy says you get that from me, but the jury is still out on that one.  You can’t do it all by yourself just yet, and yes little one I am your Mommy and though you are a princess I am still Queen.

May the Lord guide your Daddy and me as we raise you.  I feel as though it may not be all that easy.


BUT I am so grateful to Him for every day I have you even the days you play in your poop and it covers your hands and clean up takes 2+ hours.  I am thankful for you on the days you make me crazy and the moments I want to cry.  I love your soft whispers, I cherish the way you cuddle, and I can’t get enough of those tender little kisses.


Happy birthday, Faith!  You are my pink treasure!

Flew to Four

I can’t believe it here I am writing another birthday post.  I know it has been said before, but where do the years ago.   Asher is 4 today!!  I can’t get over how much a year changes a little boy.  Taller, heavier, wearing 4t not 3, but really just in how he interacts with others.  Ever so slowly he is starting to come out of his shell.  He still stands in front of the church and won’t open his mouth while the kids around him are singing out loudly.  He shyly turns his head when someone he doesn’t know greets him.  BUT lately teachers say “He talked more today”  “He is starting to share more.”  The best is that he is saying his Awana Bible verses to whoever will listen.  6 verses, my son can quote. He loves school and learning new things.  He is a sponge for knowledge.   A man at church he calls Pop due to the closeness of our families was greeted the other night with an enthusiastic hug; where before he was rarely greeted with a “hi.”  Of all the subtle changes, my favorite was the day he looked at me and said, “I want to pray for lunch.”  It was a simple “Thank you God for my food.  Amen.”  But the tears welled up in my eyes for this was a GIGANTIC leap in his life.  If you have ever had the pleasure of meeting my little man, you probably weren’t greeted, most likely not smiled at, and you very possibly only got the view of the top of his head as he stared at the ground.  However keep trying, I think by 5 you may actually see the color of his eyes.


You make Mommy crazy some days with the way you nonstop chatter.  You make me pray for patience as we work on your repeated sins.  You also make me laugh with some of the phrases you say.  I can’t help but wonder at your observations of the world.  You take on whole new perspectives I myself would have missed without you there.  You make me cry, you touch my heart; and you make me fall to my knees praising God for the gift that is you.   I’ll never forget the years I prayed for you.  May you grow to be an amazing man of God and continue to find joy in the little things.  For even on our worst days, I find joy in you.

Love always and forever,


Good for Laugh

I realize I am way behind with any posting. But some things can not go without being written down.

Tonight Lance and I hear a thud from Asher’s room. He has fallen out
of bed before; however tonight we think he was sleep walking. Lance
finds him sitting on the edge of the bed facing the wall. He goes to
comfort him, and Asher begins mumbling in his sleep. He proceeds to
pull away from Lance, climb out of bed, walk across the room, and pull
out one if his fabric bins. Next is where Lance springs into action,
cuz our son drops his pants and gets in the position to pee.
Hehe…wow the stories kids give us to tell!!

Out of the mouth….

Asher is coughing. “Mom all this hard work is making me cough.”
“Yeah, babe, I don’t know where that cough is from.”
“God made me cough.”
“Oh he did?”
“Yeah the other day when he was here.”
“God was here?”
“No, when I was at his place and he was making us.”

Oh man, where does he get this stuff. Later I asked him again where did God make you. “Back at his place.”

Just too long for a status

So Lance gets a kick out of my ADD tendencies when my brain is in overdrive and I tend to spout stuff out that makes total sense in my head but that’s just it, it was a trail I took in my head but only chose to share a piece of it with him. He is always lost and I don’t get why he can’t follow my train of thinking.
Today this very same ADD issue came out in my cleaning. I started out the day with plans to do the normal chores for getting the house ready for company. You know….pick-up clutter, dust, vacuum, change bedding, and of course bathrooms. This is how it went. Pick-up…oh there is that small box of Christmas stuff that never got put away….start looking around for the snowman winter stuff to add to it. Nicely stored in a tub…clean corner by the fireplace…vacuum up wood pieces…sweep out fireplace…vacuum remaining residue of ash. Wow that got vacuum dirty….shake out vacuum chamber….UGH that filter I can’t stand how dirty it gets….get online for an hour searching for replacement filters at good cost…can’t find matching model number…order part that looks right hope it works when it gets here. Clean all vacuum parts, lay them out in the sun….mmm, SUN….cold but nice…the dog needs a moment of my time. Throw the ball with dog to enjoy the sun. Back in to vacuum….move furniture around…nah, I’ll wait for Lance to maybe rearrange our furniture. That plant is overgrown…cut back plant. Think about dead plant on the front porch, go to move it…oh ambulance in my cul-de-sac….keep eye on it to see for which neighbor. Snowman mat still on porch….go to move it…needs to be swept….clean front porch….replace with general Welcome mat. Come in….oh the plant I was trimming. It really needs new potting soil. Replace soil…figure soil is out, kitchen floor is dirty….get other plant trim it down to nothing and add soil. I sweep up my mess and look at the clock 3pm to realize I have not stopped to eat. Fix plate…sit down to think about all I have not accomplished and laugh, “If Lance only knew.” Figure might as well post about it. Surely I am not the only woman in the world who is like this.

Hope this gives some of you something to relate to and others of you something to laugh at….and Honey, you may say, “I told you so.”
OH, and yes through all this I did feed my kiddos, played with them for a bit, and put them both down to nap. BUT have very little house actually cleaned. *SIGH*